Negative Comments: Tear Your Hope Apart

The lyrics of I Dreamed a Dream from Les Miserables speaks to an issue many bloggers face.

I dreamed a dream in time gone by
When hope was high
And life worth living.
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving
Then I was young and unafraid
And dreams were made and used and wasted.
There was no ransom to be paid
No song unsung, no wine untasted.

But the tigers come at night
With their voices soft as thunder
As they tear your hope apart
As they turn your dream to shame.

We start our blogs with such hope, such confidence, then alone comes someone with a meanness in their spirit or nothing better to do than be nasty, and all those youthful hopes and confident dreams are dashed to the ground.

While it’s nice to say “Don’t let them get you down,” that’s not very helpful.

What is helpful is letting you know now that mean and unkind people are out there and your blog will become a target.

Knowing what is coming means you can prepare for the worse.

Be confident in what you say. Know the facts, and if you rely upon the truth, it will be by your side.

Be prepared to NOT defend yourself first. Breath. You knew this moment would arrive. You are prepared. Your confidence is strong.

Ask yourself if they really wish to do you harm or are they playing devil’s advocate?

If the latter, consider your response wisely and respond in a way to continue the conversation in an educational debate format.

If the former, remember you have choices. As yourself:

  1. Is the purpose of the comment to attract attention to themselves and their blog?
  2. Does the comment deserve or require a response? Maybe it speaks for itself.
  3. Is this comment valid or have some merit?
  4. Does this comment make me sick to my stomach? Can I get through the next day without thinking about it?

If there is any validity to the comment, but some doubt remains, you can edit the comment to remove the links or change the spammy name or edit it to suit the style of your site, making it a part of the conversation, just slightly tweaked.

If you aren’t sure, put it in moderation. It’s not a final decision. It gives you time to decide.

If it makes you ill, festers at your spirit – delete it.

Now you are better prepared and know your options. You will be ready to face the tigers that tear your hope apart.

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